Ho-hum. It’s another less-than-fantastic edition of Fantasy Suite Week (FSW). One of the problems that plagued this one was the short season and not really knowing the Final Three girls or getting a sense of how strong their connections with Grant are.
But my indifference to FSW – as compared to my love of the drama of the Women Yell All1 – is how predictably tropey they are. Each FSW is the same; all that changes are the names. Let’s walk through the list.
Coaches Trope. With an engagement in a week on the line, each girl gets coached up by somebody who has been through it before [cue The Beatles With a Little Help From My Friends]. Juliana gets Daisy from last season (Joey), and I loves me some impossibly cute Daisy. Juliana who? Daisy was Joey’s runner-up who eliminated herself when she realized that Kelsey, and not her, was Joey’s person.
Zoe’s coach is Rachel, who was eliminated after Joey’s FSW. And Litia’s coach is Kaity, who I had to be reminded won Zach’s forgettable season. Hmmm . . . Kaity won The Bachelor. Foreshadowing for Litia?
Worries Trope, Part 1. Each girl is worried about Grant spending the night with the other two girls.
Worries Trope, Part 2. Occasionally, we get a girl who is worried about herself spending the night with The Bachelor. This time, it is Litia. She accepted his invitation, lovingly handwritten by the Evil Genius Producers (EGPs) [cue The Rolling Stones Let’s Spend the Night Together], after letting Grant know that there would be no zoom-a-zoom-zoom-zoom in a pum pum2.
Hard Questions Trope. Each couple is looking forward to that last alone time where they can ask each other the “hard questions.” The answer to one such question was Grant’s favorite color is blue, while Zoe’s is teal.
I’d Like to Get to Know You Trope [cue Spanky and Our Gang Like to Get to Know You]. Each couple is looking forward to learning more about each other. Grant, in particular, tells Zoe, “I don’t know that much about you.” Could be problematic if you’re thinking about getting engaged to someone in a week. He did find out her favorite color, though.
Of course, there is the obvious fact that these are couples whose time together can be measured in hours rather than months or years.
Feeling Good Trope [cue Nina Simone Feeling Good]. The morning after, one party always asks the other party, “How are you feeling?” The other party always answers, “Good.” Deeply insightful.
Opening Up Trope. There’s always at least one girl who is anxious about whether she can “open up.” The EGPs always give a lot of screentime to this person’s anxiety. This time it was Juliana.
L-words and Falling-words Trope. Ah, yes. That magical alone time without cameras gets couples feeling all the feels, and it’s pretty standard now that the lead will break the unspoken rule that you can’t say, “I L you.” You can say “falling for you” or get right up to the line by saying, “I’m falling in L with you.” Grant broke the code by telling Litia he is in L with her.
The only thing about FSW that isn’t tropey is the Rose Ceremony. Yes, it followed the usual dramatic script, including Jesse’s final “when you’re ready” to the lead before they give out the last Rose, but the mystery of who the Final Two are is often hard to predict. The EGPs typically do a good job throughout each season of casting some doubt about the obvious favorite – in this case, Litia – and creating suspense between the other two contestants, this time Juliana and Zoe.
Alas, Zoe was not to be Grant’s person, leaving us with Juliana and Litia and one interesting historical fact. Juliana’s FSW date was shown first, and per @Bachleordata IG, the first date has NEVER won The Bachelor. That is interesting.
On the one hand, it’s been so evident that Litia is The One. He dropped the L-bomb on her!!! On the other hand are the previews we’ve been seeing all season with Grant hanging on the cliff, unable to decide. How is this even possible? I believe the EGPs have been messing with us to pull one more trope out in The Finale – “THIS IS THE MOST (fill in the blank) EVER IN BACHELOR HISTORY.”
And Grant will break Juliana’s heart (and, in some way, his own), get down on his knee with the Neil Lane ring, and propose to Litia.
And I’ll miss it because I’ll be going out of town to visit my Dad and going with him to a jazz concert that night. Honestly, that’s a good tradeoff.
P.S. This week’s viewing wine was a Method Cab from Costco. It was just aight. Adequate, but I won’t buy it again as there are better options at that under $15 price.
Ray's Musings 
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