Act I: Get Me the F Outta Here The episode kicked off with another Relationship Test unrelated to anything in the real world, unless locking your partner into a treasure chest is a thing for you. As claustrophobic as I am, this was triggering1. As always, the game featured Jesse giving indecipherable rules that made... Continue Reading →

Welp, the New Evil Genius Producers (NEGPs) done did it. This week was The. Best. Episode. Of. The. Season. This week was The. Most. Confusing. Episode. Of. The. Season. As sports TV personality Mike Wilbon loves to say, “More than one thing can be true.” Moreover, the NEGPs also managed to make us experience a... Continue Reading →

Cue Tommy Edwards It's All in the Game Many a tear has to fall, but it's all in the gameAll in the wonderful game that we know as love As we know, because Jesse says so, is that Paradise is and has always been about finding love. But I can tell you. Everything. Is. Going.... Continue Reading →

Monday night, Days 9 and 10 of Paradise, had the feel of an OG BIP - a fast-moving combo of dates, games, and drama. Let's break down my highlights. Kat stirs Dale’s pot by asking him if he’s open to dating someone. It was a yes or no question, and as usual, Dale failed to give... Continue Reading →

With two hours of content this week instead of five like the prior two weeks, I have time to answer your burning Paradise questions! Q: How awkward was April’s physically flirting with Jonathan by laying her head on his bare chest and purring? A: Yes. Q: How does April being an airhead a free spirit... Continue Reading →

TL;DR Tuesday’s Episode 3 was perfunctory and fast-moving, with minimal drama and horny old people who use modern slang like “no cap.” Here are the highlights. Closure: The Susie/Justin cliffhanger was resolved by BOTH leaving Paradise despite pleas from Jesse, various cast members, and me, because who doesn’t want more of Susie? (cue Maurice Williams... Continue Reading →