How Not to Bachlorette

Junior Evil Genius Producer (JEGP): “Which tropes do you want to use for the premiere?” Senior Evil Genius Producer (SEGP): “Yes.” They’re probably so happy to be making a more COVID-free show that they just trotted out the big guns right off the bat. The Mama Trope – the show started with Michelle’s mom. But... Continue Reading →

Previewing the Premiere

While technically, this is the first blog entry of Michelle’s season of The Bachelorette, it’s really a placeholder until I can write a more proper blog. By “proper,” I mean the inclusion of an appropriate level of snark. Due to a variety of professional obligations, I will be late in fulfilling my non-professional obligations. But... Continue Reading →

It’s Now or Never

Here is where we are as a society. A nerdy, ex-radio DJ turned Bachelor franchise star that nobody heard of five years ago is in a commercial with hip-hop legend Lil Jon. And I was there to see it. It's been a long season. At least it felt that way for some reason, even though... Continue Reading →

Alexa. When Will This Be Over?

“Three hours feels like punishment.” – My Daughter Diandra (MDD) Seriously? TWO THREE-HOUR episodes to close out this season of Paradise? We’re gonna have to call in reinforcements. The Evil Genius Producers (EGPs) hate us. They drag us through three hours to put the relationship of The Rehabilitated Noah and Everybody Loves Abigail on the... Continue Reading →

The History of a Theme Song

While watching the intro to Paradise the other night, my eye caught Ann Wilson’s name in the closed caption. In a blog entry from last year,[1] I incorrectly credited the great Ann Wilson from Heart as a co-writer on the Bachelor in Paradise theme song. I was shocked in a good way that the woman... Continue Reading →

A Dull Night in Paradise

At this point in the season, the show is getting low on content. I agree with My Daughter Diandra (MDD): “We’re wringing out the washcloth, getting what we can out of it.” Coming out of that washcloth were the few drops left of Kendall and Grocery Store Joe’s (GSJ’s) relationship, which wasn’t much. You’re right.... Continue Reading →


Cue Lizzo: “Why men great, ‘til they gotta be great?”[1] Yeah, Dr. Joe. We see you. And once again, the Evil Genius Producers (EGPs) worked their malevolent magic by making us think they brought Dr. Joe to cure Natasha of the Lovesick Blues (cue Hank Williams). But, Nah, they brought in the nerdy but likable... Continue Reading →

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