Oh Mari Won’t You Weep?

“So much and yet so little.” My Daughter Diandra (MDD) aptly summarizing this evening’s Paradise wackiness. If there were a theme for tonight, it would be another MDD observation, “We need a search and rescue mission for these relationships.” In that regard, we can start with Mari, who lit her relationship with Kenny on fire... Continue Reading →

Of Trichotomies and Dichotomies

The deceit of Paradise is that, despite the madness, at its core, it’s like the rest of The Bachelor franchise in that ultimately, it’s about two people coming together. This is a lie. The truth – and we love it so[1] – is that it ultimately is about two people coming apart in myriad, maniacal... Continue Reading →

Demi Does Damage

“Looking forward to the chaos.” “No one is safe.” “Welcome to Paradise.” These were actual lines uttered by Paradise participants. Nothing describes this show better than that. All we need is some music. Mr. DJ, how ‘bout some Temptations Ball of Confusion? I’m not even going to try to build a chronology of events for... Continue Reading →

Let the Summer Madness Begin!

“I enjoyed kissing Tre more than his uncle”, is something you can only expect to hear on Bachelor in Paradise. For some reason, we didn’t get the tongue-in-cheek-and-so-cheesy-it-works theme song, so I’m gonna have to play DJ and cue up Motley Crüe Girls, Girls, Girls, and Lady Gaga Boys Boys Boys. As always, the first... Continue Reading →

Everybody Needs Therapy. Or More Wine.

Me, angrily at 8:45 Eastern Standard Time: “I refuse to let myself believe she ends up with Blake!” And then My Daughter Diandra (MDD) chides me for not having had enough wine at that point to prepare myself for this sudden, horrifying realization. Here is how this season ended. Blake picks out an engagement ring... Continue Reading →

Most Dramatic Show Ever? (yes)

Finally. After all of Chris Harrison’s breathless pronouncements of “THE most dramatic episode/moment/season in Bachelor history,” tonight it actually happened. We were warned several hours before. Basically, Katie’s conundrum, which has Bachelor Nation in an uproar and taking sides, is this. The Two Guys That Katie Actually Likes We were given plenty of foreshadowing when... Continue Reading →

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑