How Do You Spell Snake?

Besides the fact that I like Rachel – I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that before – I really like this season’s Ray-Approved Dates™. A few weeks ago they were hoopin’ for Rachel’s heart. This week there was a Spelling Bee! “Yo, Rachel! I got your onomatopoeia right here, girl. Right after I nail this three-pointer. Boom! Nothin’ but net! Now, you got any other six syllable words you want me to spell?”

At that point, I’d rattle off something like “ratiocination” or “prestidigitation”, bang another three-ball, and then turn around and tell all the other guys to eat it.

Dates aside, this episode was a bit heavy with testosterone-fueled, male ego-laden drama although Rachel had her own Bachelorette “this is going to be harder than I thought” moment early on. Chris Harrison’s sympathetic response was, “Just tell me what you need. I can facilitate anything.” My Daughter Cassandra totally cracked me up by saying, “He sounds like a mob boss.” I had to pause the DVR to allow my mind to conjure up music from The Godfather 2 and imagining Chris speaking in Al Pacino’s voice, “What do you need? Do you need me to take somebody out? Squeeze a couple of the guys? Get you a meeting?”

The rest of the drama was co-facilitated by Overprotective Iggy[1] and Snake in the Grass Lee. As to Iggy, is anybody other than me concerned that overprotective also might mean over-controlling? At best, he’s merely meddlesome. At worst, he’s scary.

But the Main Event – spread over two nights? – is another chapter in the history of Bachelor/Bachelorette classic protagonist battles in a two-on-one date, in this case between the Snake and Kenny the Wrestler.[2] I agree with whatever guy said that Lee is the guy who’s talked [bleep] his whole life and nobody’s made him stop. And I empathize with Kenny because that is the kind of guy who has always been particularly annoying to me. I’m hoping Lee gets his comeuppance but what I’m really looking forward to is seeing how the editing of the previews will have had literally nothing to do with what actually happens this week.

As to romance, I’m still having trouble figuring out who’s who and who Rachel really likes, if anybody, at this point. There’s still too much clutter many guys and too much widespread drama for me to project who’s likely to be around at the end.

More importantly, aren’t we happy that we’ll still get to go to Paradise this summer? 🙂

__________________________________________________

[1] Rachel, Rachel, Rachel, why is he still there instead of My Boy Diggy with The Bow Ties?

[2] Did I make that sound important enough?