Most Dramatic Show Ever? (yes)

Finally. After all of Chris Harrison’s breathless pronouncements of “THE most dramatic episode/moment/season in Bachelor history,” tonight it actually happened.

We were warned several hours before.

Basically, Katie’s conundrum, which has Bachelor Nation in an uproar and taking sides, is this.

The Two Guys That Katie Actually Likes

We were given plenty of foreshadowing when Greg “accidentally” somehow got a ringside seat to portions of Blake’s date with Katie.

cue Taylor Swift I Knew You Were Trouble
Evil Genius Producers seeing their Evil Ways.

Fast-forward to the relationship meltdown that has Bachelor Nation lit up like the fireworks on a hot 1-on-1. Even in my house, while it never got heated, it was clear that I was slightly favoring one side of the Katie/Greg contretemps, while My Daughter Diandra (MDD) was slightly leaning the other.

Where we both agreed is that the most significant fault lies in the show itself, or as I like to say, what happens when a reality show gets real? What happens when the abnormal structure of a relationship show doesn’t allow the people to process a relationship problem in a normal way? What happens when a person has found their person, but the contrivances of the show don’t allow them to relate to their person as if they were their person outside of the Hyatt Regency Tamaya Resort & Spa? Especially since the other person who was her person had already self-eliminated? See how messy this is?

MDD and I also agreed that the other culprits are, well, all of us in Bachelor Nation, who gladly accept the ridiculiciousness of the show’s machinations as entertainment. It was inevitable that we would eventually get to a point where a couple would have a real-world relationship conflict that would not have been a relationship ender – or maybe it would have? – in a world without Rose Ceremonies and a proposal deadline.

Like I said, Bachelor Nation is on fire and taking sides. The podcasts and think pieces are going to have their biggest week ever. For my part, I’ve said from early on that Katie had Two Guys She Actually Liked, and we’re here now because both of them self-eliminated even before Fantasy Suites. And the Nation can seethe in our pool of personality differences and confirmation biases. Greg is an emotional manipulator! Katie lacks empathy! Greg didn’t feel heard! Katie all but told him he was The One!

Aside from that, I have another major grievance with tonight’s show. Justin was supposed to show Baltimore to Katie? As someone who lives near enough and has spent untold hours in this city, how do you show somebody Baltimore without any references to the Inner Harbor; the iconic Camden Yards baseball stadium; Fort McHenry, which inspired Francis Scott Key to write the Star-Spangled Banner; or any of the many music venues (where I have spent most of those untold hours)? And no reference to the Mayor’s (Brandon Scott) fabulous ‘fro? What we even doing out here, man?

Good moments – Kaitlyn talking to a Dazed and Confused (cue Led Zeppelin) Katie through her door. This moment would have been a hot mess with Chris Harrison. It needed and got a best-girlfriend’s touch.

Ain’t no way Chris Harrison does this.

OK. So we are left hanging on the biggest cliff ever. The Two Guys She Likes are gone. What happens from here?

P.S. Tonight’s viewing wine is a Portuguese blend with the interesting name of Waterdog. 90 points from Wine Enthusiast for under $10.

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