The state of The Bachelor union is getting hard to watch. Where did the producers get these people from?
[cue Britney Spears (You Drive Me) Crazy] And who, specifically, is driving me crazy?
Let’s start with Pushover Peter. It’s an admirable thing to find a positive quality in everybody you meet. It’s quite another to believe all those people will make a potential life partner. Kinda defeats the whole soul mate thing, doesn’t it? Every girl makes him feel “so” something: “I so appreciate . . .”, “I am so amazed . . .”, “I love that you’re so . . .”
Peter says he’s just following his heart. My Crack Research Staff found the map he’s using.
His lack of self-awareness is a thing, too:
Peter to the girls: “I’m not perfect. I appreciate getting called out.”
Kelly calls Peter out in their 1-on-1.
Peter (shows his appreciation):
Kelly: “You reward the drama.”
Also Peter rewarding Kelsey, the Queen of the Drama.
Of course, Pushover Peter gives Kelly a rose even though he didn’t really want to give her a rose.
And then there’s the concern he has about the girls who have red flags:
The girls have their share of issues, too, that qualify many of them for the (You Drive Me Crazy) List. Obviously, there’s Kelsey, The Curator of Crazy.
And she’s handling her wine like there’s more where that came from.
Of course, Pushover Peter gave her a rose – BEFORE THE ROSE CEREMONY!!!
And then there’s Tammy the Two-Faced who can’t keep her second-hand conversations quiet or straight. Naturally, Pushover Peter gave her a rose after she pulled him aside during the Rose Ceremony.
Also on the Crazy List is Sydney, who broke our hearts with her tales of the racism she experienced in high school. Can’t fault Pushover Peter for giving her a rose. But here’s evidence of the alleged shame she suffered in school as well as the Homecoming she never went to.
Someone’s got some ‘splainin’ to do. The internet has the receipts, people.
And then there’s Victoria F., the group date winner of the March Cosmopolitan cover (somehow, Hannah Ann’s modeling experience wasn’t all that helpful for a Cosmo shoot LOL).
Anyway, word came out from Cosmo soon after the show that Victoria F. has some issues that caused them to pull her from the cover. Google it, if you like. Again, the internet has the receipts.
And how did neither Deandra nor Lexi win the photo shoot?
Naturally, Pushover Peter gave Cryin’ Mykenna a rose after she pulled him aside during the Rose Ceremony. Over Lexi?????
Basically, Madi (out-stretched legs) is done with these bishes. Girl, get out before it’s too late!! Pushover Peter is a problem!
And to think, we have two more hours of this to look forward to Wednesday night.
 My favorite of several nicknames suggested by My Daughter Cassandra.
 I can hear My Girl Britney’s voice going “Sing It!”
 Supposedly, there’s a two-drink limit. I’ve heard that came about over the Bachelor in Paradise alleged sexual assault scandal a few seasons ago involving DeMario and Corinne. Supposedly, contestants try to get around that restriction.